Fragments of Thoughts
by Ariennye
Summary: A series of short stories, elaborating on what the characters may have been thinking during different parts of the game.
1. Despair

Despair (Freya Cresent, Dragon Knight of Burmecia)

I kneel here, barely listening to Zidane and Vivi. They're talking about about something. A part of me acknowledges it may be important. But that doesn't matter right now. I'm more concerned about Sir Fratley.

He was right there... actually there! And alive! I knew he was, deep down inside...but I needed to see it with my own eyes. And now I have. And yet...I imaged our meeting day as being a happier occasion. So we met again in a war torn city, when black mages were on the way. But if he had just remembered me, everything would have been alright. Yet in reality he just stood there, asking who I was, where I knew him from. The moment, the piece of time, that hurt. More than the rumors of his death, more than the waiting.

I can't believe he doesn't remember...but I still do. I remember when I first met him, when we were both dragon knights. For a long time we were friends, fighting together, willing to die together. And yet, so much changed after I met him, just as so much changed on that fateful day three years ago, when Fratley left to train, to better fight for the glory of Burmecia.

My Burmecia! Once so proud, but now it is merely a dead city, a ghost town...

I am suddenly aware of Zidane and Vivi talking to me. "Just leave me alone." I murmur, unwilling to move. I don't think my legs can support me. So many shocks, all in one day...

"Someone's coming!" I hear Zidane say. I gather my strength, and follow them to a hiding place behind the stairs, where I once again collapse to the ground. I can once again hear the world passing me by, but I do not care. All I want is solitude, and my thoughts.

I cannot believe Queen Brahne destroyed my city. We did nothing to her, nothing! And yet she comes, with those black mages and the powerful Alexandrian army. And that General Beatrix! Fratley left to challenge her, to become the most skilled spearman Burmecia and the entire Mist Continent had ever seen. Oh Burmecia, my last memories of you are from three years ago...now it is gone. I must accept that and move on, just as I must accept Sir Fratley remembers nothing, and move on. But I can't move on, I don't want to move on.

"Let's go up there, and find Queen Brahne!" Zidane says, and I follow him once again. We run up the stairs, down a walkway, and end up at a dead end. And there she is. Queen Brahne the destroyer herself. But... she has a glint of malice in her eyes, as she looks down at helpless Cleyra. She speaks to Beatrix...that foul Beatrix! But it is like watching a movie on mute, I don't know what was said. But Beatrix is walking away, looking...confused? Not precisely how I had imagined a terrible, cold-hearted killer to look. But my attention is once again focused on Brahne. She summons an orb up, calling to Odin. _ODIN?! How...how can she?!?! I can't believe this...please let this be a bad dream I just want to wake up please let me wake up this can't be real oh please someone anyone please please make it go away it's not happening!_ I pull myself together. This is not the behavior of a dragon knight. I must accept what has happened, and face what is happening. I look at the reddened sky, knowing what must come next. But then I look down. I must remember Cleyra as the magnificent city in the treetops. I must have one last glimpse, something I will never have with Burmecia. I see Odin appear above Cleyra, and a terrible beam of unspeakable evil shoot from it, engulfing Cleyra. Odin returns to the fiery abyss from whence he came, and Brahne speaks. But I remain fixated on Cleyra, a smoldering crater. Not wanting to remember Cleyra like this, I focus on Brahne's words.

"...Garnet will be executed upon my return."

"Dagger!" Zidane yelps from his position on the walkway next to me. "We've got to do something! We need to get there before her!" I resist the urge to laugh, knowing it will infuriate him. That Zidane alright. Always wanting to help other people.

"We'll find a way." I say, but I am not so sure.

"Follow me!" Vivi speaks up from behind me, and walks away. I immediately follow, although Zidane lags behind, doubtful. But I know Vivi has to be sure. Vivi rarely suggests things, and rarely so confidently, I know he must have a good idea. I see him stop near the teleporters we used to get here, and wonder why we are here. Zidane walks up behind me.

"That guard said these went to Alexandria." Vivi says, by way of an explanation.

Zidane thinks for a split-second. A record for him, I am sure. "Alight then, let's go!" he says. We all jump into a separate teleporters.

"I'm coming, Dagger!" I hear Zidane say, before we are compressed into little spheres for travelling.

I can't believe he doesn't remember...but I still do. I always have, and I always will.

_To be forgotten is truly worse than death._


	2. How Could You?

How could you? (Garnet Til Alexandros 17th, Princess of Alexandria)

_Mother...how could you? _I can't believe all of this. I look back on everything she's done. Attacking Lindblum, descimating Burmecia, fundin the creation of those black mages, helping Kuja... oh god, how could you? I even heard from the others about that place...what was it again...Cleyra. Where you called for a eidolon and birned the place until it was a pile of ash and sorrow. I remember when I was younger, when Father was still alive...you were kinder, nicer, you cared. And now, greed has attached it's cold, slimy tendrils to your once warm heart, and has turned you around.

Damn that Kuja! I never swore before, but now I want to. I want to cry and scream and throw a tantrum until I am so tired I just fall asleep. And I don't want to be here seeing this. I can't believe what I saw from my too excellent vantage point on the Iifa Tree.

She was coming toward Kuja, with that greedy look on her face. The one that has marred her visage for several years now. She was going to kill him, even though it meant destroying others, destroying the Iifa Tree, held in reverence by the people of Conde Petite.

And now I wonder. How did Kuja warp her? How did he make her so...so...greedy, so cruel, so cold? What did he use on her? Were there other people out there, equally warped by him?

And all those innocents out there, ruined by his greed. The people of Burmecia, thrown out of their home, then destroyed in their new home, merely because he wanted to control the Mist Continent. The people of Cleyra, who opened their doors to the refugees of Burmecia, and who were killed for it. Linblum, who took a less terrible beating, but a painful one. They lost so many, and there are still meny left living, who lost their families and their friends, and must still live with the guilt that they are alive, and so many good people are dead. And what of Alexandria? What of people like Beatrix, who was merely following orders because she loved her country? And what of the people of Alexandria, who had to sit by as our once great nation became no better than the endless groups of thieves and raiders, powerless to do anything?

What will be Kuja's next move? Where will he go from here? I have to stop him! I have to stop him from dragging more innocents into this battle, I have to stop him from hurting more people.

Mother is stirring now. "I hear the voice of my daughter..." she whispers.

"I am here, Mother!" I say, holding her. I keep the tears from falling, as I must be strong.

"I'm free now from that endless greed...Alexandria will fare better with you on the throne..." she whispers. Her hand drops, and so does her life. I try to stop the tears that fall down my face, but it is useless. They come, forming a path down my cheeks. If only I could have saved her, if only I had other eidolons, instead of Leviathan, the water killer, and Ramuh, who uses deadly thunder magic. Thunder with water...great combination.

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry..." I murmur. "I will help Alexandria, Mother, I promise...I'm so sorry."

After a moment of silence in her honor, I stand. Now is not the time for myself. Now is the time to be strong. After Kuja is gone I can mourn Mother. I must return to Alexandria. I turn toward the others, and beckon them over here.

_Don't worry, Mother. I'll be fine, sooner or later. And I will return Alexandria to it's former glory._

_I'll miss you._


	3. I Just Don't Understand…

I just don't understand... (Amarant, Security Guard)

That stupid little brat Zidane...I can't believe I became the most wanted man in Treno because of him. And I still can't understand him! What was all of that about 'the sly eagle doesn't kill at whim' or whatever? He just...he just...decided not to fight! He seems really powerful...and yet...he doesn't flaunt his power, or even use it that much. He only uses it when others are in danger...why? He could be the most sought-after assassin in all of the Mist Continent...hell, probably all of Gaia! And yet...

All he really wants to do is stay with his friends? Why, why, why?! I just don't understand this at all. Why give up all this power...all this glory...for mere mortal people? What's so great about having friends, about sticking with people no matter what? Why would you want to do somthing like that?

Now, how did I get dragged into all of this again? Oh yes, back at Madain Sari...when I had to fight that brat again...but even then, he wasn't fighting for the glory of defeating me, or even because I wanted to fight him. It was because I had that stupid jewel, and he wanted it. Just to give back to a friend! Why waste something that will probably sell high by giving it to someone? At least charge some gil near it's worth...

I wonder...why doesn't he flaunt power? Why doesn't he take what he could?

Here I am, walking the main roads like I own them. With my reputation, I could. And when I'm done understanding all of this, I will. Because that's one of the first rules in combat, and whan you're the ruler of a place. Understand your enemies. Understand how they think, how they act, why they act the way they do. If you can't understand and predict them, you won't be able to hold your power. So I need to understand for a reason. I'm not understanding because I'm curious about this, or because I think that being a weakling is good. I'm not doing this because I want to be like him. I'm doing this to help myself, and that's it.

If I finally dispose of him, I'll be the most powerful person around. Not him, me. People think I'm the most powerful now, but someday they're going to realized I'm not. They won't fear me as much, I won't be in control. _That _is why I'm with him, why I'm helping him. _Not_ because I'm weak.

Zidane said he saw Lani yesterday, when he went to Madain Sari again. I don't know why he was there. But he said she was different. That she felt happy, and free. That she wasn't exactly that into bounty hunting anymore. I didn't believe him, though. She was like me, bounty hunter to the core. Elite of the elite, making lots of money, powerful, feared by all.

So I went to see her. She wouldn't talk to me at first, kept runnng off. Finally, she stopped to talk to me from the top of a wall.

"Look, Amarant, the deal with Branhe is off. The dead don't pay the money."

"Zidane said you'd changed."

"I have. At first, I resented being here. I hated that the moogles had let a defeated person like me live. But then I started to relax for the first time in ages. No worries about killing someone, about someone killing me, about how much money I'll get, about anything. And then I realized I was happy."

"How can a person be happy, being weak, being prey?"

"But that's just it! I don't _have_ to be weak, I don't _have_ to be prey! All I need to do is take care of myself when someone attacks me, keep my skills honed, that kind of thing. But other than that, I'm free. And I like it." Then she did something I've never seen her do before. She laughed. A rich, happy laugh I supposed people would call it. I wouldn't know though. I don't laugh. "You're still the same, Amarant. You don't understand how a person can be happy, and not hunt bounties." She started to jump away, leaping lightly from wall to wall. She turned back when she was almost out of sight.

"Keep hanging around with that kid, Amarant. He might teach you a thing or two about living." Then she was gone.

And still I'm wandering the streets of Treno, pondering her words. I _am_ living. I'm living because I kill. It's part of my motto, the words I live by: 'I kill, therefore I survive.' How can there be any other kind of living?

_I just don't understand..._


End file.
